Can't take it anymore
by Murderous Fuck
Summary: K X O. Don't like yaoi, don't read .Kabuto misses Orochimaru badly. He don't want to let him go. Warning, there's some yaoi action. Rated to M...I'm not sure is it the real rate. This is my first story I write in english...


**It was dark night of September. Winter was coming. Moon and stars were shining brightly in the sky. Brightness of the moon and stars made the lake look like a bridge to the heaven. Water of the lake was pure and cold. Air was freezing, so freezing that breath turned in to steam. Leaves were falling from the trees. Ground was full of colourful leaves; sadly it was night, so the beautiful colours of leaves stayed in the shadows, hiding from the light of the full moon. **

**Deep s****ilence… no, it wasn't completely silent. Water made its own sound, tender wind was blowing, leaves were moving… and someone ran very fast in the forest. **

"**I have to get away… from the prison of misery… I can't take it any longer…" Kabuto thought, biting his teeth together. Kabuto was crying… his tears told the sad story of ****love… love that was just started to bloom. He couldn't revive his love, it was too late…love of his life was dead and buried forever...  
**

**Kabuto remembered it too clearly. He wanted to forget it… forget the most painful moment of his life. He couldn't do it. He tried so hard to make it go away, his memory brought that horrible scene in his mind over and over again… the scene of his love dying slowly… leaving Kabuto alone in the cruel lonely world. He denied it… he didn't want to believe it…just forget it and bury forever…**

_**Flashback**_

_That strange feeling had bullied him for so long. He knew what it was and how to cure it…but he couldn't. Maybe it would help…but then again, it could destroy his whole life__, all those things what for he would die to protect them. _

"_I wish I would be brave enough… brave enough to tell him how I feel…" Kabuto sat on his bed, feel__ing unhappy about his feelings for Orochimaru._

"_Orochimaru is Orochimaru.__ He has never shown any emotions of love. I would be like an idiot if I would tell him…" Kabuto thought and smiled sadly._

"_I love you…Orochimaru-sama. I want you to know, I will be there for you, always…__" Kabuto's lips moved, but voice didn't come out. He wanted to tell it to Orochimaru, but he was too scared to say it aloud. Kabuto cleaned his glasses and sighed._

"_When I get this feeling…I feel so weak and stupid…like I would just tease my heart because of love that can never be true…" Kabuto whispered, as tears run away from his eyes. _

"_Kabuto…come here…" Orochimaru said loudly, he was standing in another room in front of the window, watching sunset. Kabuto heard his voice, wiped tears away and walked to that room where Orochimaru was. He had no idea what was going to happen…_

"_Lord Orochimaru… what is it?" Kabuto asked__ when he walked in the room. Orochimaru was quiet for few seconds._

"_Please…don't call me that…" Orochimaru said.__ Still he watched sunset. Sun was shining straight to his face. Orochimaru was beautiful in Kabuto's eyes. He looked peaceful, kind and his skin wasn't so pale as normally._

"_Is something w__rong…?" Kabuto asked. He was very worried about Orochimaru as always. Orochimaru was everything he had, he wanted to keep him save, no matter what it would cost to him._

"…" _Orochimaru didn't say anything. Kabuto get even more worried about him, he knew something was wrong… terribly wrong…_

"_Orochimaru… speak to me… I know something bothers you, I don't let you get away with this that easy…you know, I want you to feel alright…I want-…" Kabuto said. Orochimaru interrupted him._

"_I just have realised… what a fool I have been…" Orochimaru said, he laughed a bit._

"_You? __Fool? What makes you think that?" Kabuto was amazed. Was that man really Orochimaru? Real one would never say that…_

"_I know what you think. I'm fine… I just realised something important… about you…" Orochimaru said, he felt little bit uncomfortable. Kabuto's heart skipped a beat or two. He froze, he couldn't move or speak, and he just stared at Orochimaru with a big surprise._

"_Don't look __at me like that… well, maybe I shouldn't tell you about it yet…" Orochimaru said grinning. Oh how much Kabuto loved that evil grin… but still he was confused about the situation._

"_No no…just tell me, I'll be fine, really…" Kabuto mumbled and tried to hold himself together. When Kabuto got nervous, he always touched his glasses for some reason._

"_Well… I happen to realise… how-…" Orochimaru paused and turned around. He watched Kabuto straight to the eyes and went closer to him. In Kabuto's mind, he felt like he could drown in those beautiful eyes._

"_Orochimaru hasn't ever been that close to me…" Kabuto thought__ and blushed. Kabuto was embarrassed. He wished he could die now or disappear in the air._

"_What? Tell me…" Kabuto whispered holding his breath. Orochimaru stopped grinning and pushed Kabuto__ gently against the wall with his body._

"_I realised… how much you mean to me. You aren't just one of my minions… you are more than that…more than good friend… more than my words can ever tell you… you are the one who keeps me alive when whole other world is against me. You have always been there for me…I appreciate it. You are love…my love… " Orochimaru whispered in Kabuto's ear. Kabuto was slightly shocked. He couldn't believe it, but after that he felt like a giant rock would fell of his heart. He was free, free to continue his life. He wasn't scared anymore, now he knew the truth…_

"_Orochimaru… are you serious?" Kabuto asked happily, his voice was trembling. He didn't have to hide his tears anymore; he didn't want to do that again. Orochimaru smiled at him. Kabuto felt like he would melt right in that place._

"_Yes, I'm serious__", Orochimaru stroked Kabuto's pure cheek with his left hand, touched Kabuto's chin with those soft cold fingers and left his hand on Kabuto's neck. He put right hand to Kabuto's hips. He kissed Kabuto's forehead, nose…and lips. Orochimaru pushed his soft lips on Kabuto's lips. Both were silent, nothing could ruin that beautiful moment. Kabuto hasn't felt anything so beautiful like that kiss felt._

"_Orochimaru… I… I don't know what to say… I don't know how long I have waited for this moment to come true…" Kabuto said crying. Tears escaped from Kabuto's eyes again and again, he couldn't help it, he was too happy. Orochimaru smiled tenderly at him and licked away his tears. Orochimaru hold Kabuto in his arms. Kabuto never wanted to get away from those arms. He never wanted to forget that. Kabuto felt save in his arms._

"_It's okay Kabuto…__no need to cry… " Orochimaru said, comforted Kabuto with kisses and hold him even more tightly in his arms. Orochimaru didn't want to let Kabuto go…never, he'd rather die than let his lover go away from his arms. Kabuto smiled and kissed back. Orochimaru lifted Kabuto on his faithful arms._

"_What if we would celebrate our love..?" Orochimaru whispered. His voice was full of passion and sex… his eyes were burning like hell's flames. Kabuto could feel his heart beating faster._

"_How could I say no to you…? I have seen you in shower… your body… it's marvellous…like a masterpiece…body of a sex god…" Kabuto said and bit Orochimaru's lower lip._

"_Hmm…trying to get in my pants, Kabuto-kun? Very clever, I must admit…" Orochimaru smirked and carried Kabuto to the bedroom, while kissing his soft lips and unleashing his hairs from the_ _scrunchie__. Kabuto's hairs spread all over his shoulders and back. Kabuto looked sexy. Orochimaru was enchanted, like he hasn't ever seen something that beautiful as Kabuto. _

"_I think you are the one who tries to get in my pants, Mr. Big Bad Snake", Kabuto said and grinned. Orochimaru threw Kabuto on the bed and instantly attacked Kabuto's neck kissing and biting it._

"_Well, I can't deny it, can I? I'll have to show you my big bad snake…if you don't mind…" Orochimaru took Kabuto's glasses away and put them on the nightstand next to the bed. Orochimaru tore Kabuto's shirt in pieces and licked his bare body. Kabuto gasped and blushed a bit. _

"_Have you done this before…?" Orochimaru asked suddenly. He teased Kabuto's body with his wet tongue and touches. Kabuto's body was aching, it begged for more, making Kabuto's mind crazier second by second, like he would go insane if he wouldn't get Orochimaru soon…he wanted him so badly…_

"_N-...no…I wanted to save it till I find someone…the real one for me…" Kabuto said, kissing and biting Orochimaru's shoulder. Kabuto ripped Orochimaru's shirt, threw it on the floor and touched his hard stomach muscles. _

"_Ungh…you think I'm the one…? I'll make it the most enjoyable moment of your life…" Orochimaru whispered in his ear and bit his earlobe. Orochimaru pushed Kabuto against the bed undressing his trousers. Kabuto undressed Orochimaru's trousers as he made a hickey in his chest and licked his nipple. They threw their trousers away. Orochimaru stuck his tongue in Kabuto's mouth, fighting against his tongue. Orochimaru touched Kabuto's body everywhere, making Kabuto moan._

"_That's not all…I can do something even more enjoyable with my tongue…"__ Orochimaru snarled. He licked and kissed Kabuto's neck, his extensible tongue wondered around Kabuto's body, going down…and inside Kabuto's pants. Orochimaru tore away his pants and licked Kabuto's hard cock. Kabuto groaned harder._

"_Hmm…it feels irresistible, doesn't it? Good…want me to continue…?" Orochimaru whispered in Kabuto's ear and touched his cock with his hand, stimulating Kabuto more. Kabuto thought he was going insane. Everything feels so good. Kabuto's body ached so badly that he couldn't get a hold of his mind anymore._

"_Oh my god…yes…Orochimaru…I want more…give me more…please!" Kabuto begged, making Orochimaru grin. He kissed Kabuto's neck few times._

"_Well then…I suppose, you are ready for it..." Orochimaru said and pushed Kabuto's back against the bed, kissing his lips reassuringly._

"_I'll promise, it won't hurt much…scream as much as you can…" Orochimaru snarled and made Kabuto scream. It wasn't a scream of pain…more likely scream of love and pleasure._

_As the sun went down, the moon rose up to the sky and stars started to light the sky, night came by._

_After their love making, Orochimaru held Kabuto close on his chest, stroking Kabuto's hair__ and kissing bite marks on his shoulder many times. Kabuto smiled exhaustedly and breathed heavily._

"_Was it as good as you thought…?" Orochimaru asked._

"_No…it was much more better than that…I haven't ever felt something that good in my whole life…" Kabuto said and cuddled up against Orochimaru._

"_Well, that's good to hear…you weren't bad at all…just perfect…" Orochimaru smiled at Kabuto and kissed his forehead._

"_Thanks…Orochimaru. I have never felt so wanted and good in my life…you make me feel like I have some kind of a purpose…when I'm with you, I'm not alone anymore…" Kabuto whispered and made a long yawn._

"_Hmm…getting tired, are we?" Orochimaru grinned and tickled Kabuto._

"_Yes! God damn it, stop it! My skin is ticklish!" Kabuto hissed and couldn't do anything else than laugh and tremble like crazy. Orochimaru teased him for a while, then he kissed Kabuto and smiled. He held Kabuto close to him and pulled blanket over them. _

"_As you want…after all you need a lot of sleep…because we are doing "it" in the morning again. It will be very tiring…so sleep…my precious…" Orochimaru whispered and fell asleep. Kabuto opened his eyes and watched Orochimaru._

"_Precious, huh…? I'll keep that on mind…" Kabuto thought and fell asleep after few minutes._

_Everything went just fine couple of months…until something bad happened…Kabuto's worst nightmare came true...Orochimaru gets killed by Sasuke. Kabuto found Orochimaru, in a very bad condition. Kabuto tried to help him…it wasn't no use…Orochimaru's wounds were too deep and Orochimaru was too weak to survive from them._

"_Orochimaru… why…why do you have to leave me…alone...in the darkness…walking without the light I lived for?__Without the light I wanted to keep safe, sacrifice my life for its sake. If there isn't nothing left…why should I bother to live without the purpose I lived for…? Why don't you take me with you…?" Kabuto cried as he held Orochimaru's body in his arms._

"_It's not…your time yet…Kabuto. Don't give up our life just because I'm not there anymore. You still have life, you live and you are strong…you can do it. Continue your life…but don't forget me…ever…and these words…I love you…" Orochimaru said coughing and spat blood out of his mouth. Still he smiled faintly at Kabuto, squeezed Kabuto's shirt in his fist and kissed Kabuto for the last time. Then he closed his eyes, stopped breathing and moving. Kabuto's eyes went wide open, his whole body was trembling. Orochimaru's body fell to the floor from his hands. Kabuto screamed, he couldn't believe it…he couldn't believe, Orochimaru was gone…forever…_

"_No!! It can't be! My Orochimaru…he's…oh my god…I can't…no…" Kabuto's mind cracked. He couldn't take it any longer, he had to runaway, fast and faraway from home…home of his and Orochimaru's…it wasn't home anymore…there weren't anything left than memories…painful ones. Kabuto ran as fast as he could, he didn't stop…until he came to the lake and sat down to a big rock. There he has sat couple of days…just thinking about Orochimaru…._

**End of flashback**

"**I don't know how many days I've been here…nea****r the sky blue lake…sitting on the big rock…crying tears of pain… and thinking of you", Kabuto thought, wiping crystal clear tears away from his soft cheek, what was covered with scars of hate and rage. Tears hurt his scars like salt…and they tasted like salt too, but he didn't care. Kabuto's skin hurt like hell… it was covered by many wounds, blood and dirt. Only one pain made him cry… it was the worst pain in the world he could imagine. Broken heart… he's heart was torn apart just few days ago. Kabuto remembers it too well… he wants to forget it… but he can't, it's too painful… it left a deep mark on him…**

"**Wounds of love…****love bites…never leaves" Kabuto said quietly, he smiled sadly and squeezed bloody and very sharp kunai in his hand. Blood on his skin, clothes and kunai… was his own blood. Then his smile disappeared… he felt so cold and alone. There was no one who could comfort him… no one who could wipe away his tears and save him from his misery. He was completely alone…drowning in his own sadness. From the bottom of his heart, he wished he could go back in time and do what he should have done. But it's impossible… he can't go back in time… he can't undo what is done… **

"**I deserve**** this pain! I couldn't save you… it was my entire fault… if I would be there for you before it was too late… you would be in here with me… alive…" Kabuto screamed and tried to fight against the tears of sorrow and pain. He took his kunai on his right hand and made another bleeding wound in his left hand. It was already full of wounds, but Kabuto couldn't stop, he felt so bad…he was desperate. Hurting himself made him feel good a little longer…but after that he felt so much miserable…**

"**If there isn't anything else to do…I have no choices left then…" Kabuto thought and walked slowly on the little wooden dock near the lake. He sees the beautiful heavenly lake.**

"**Well…at least my watery grave is beautiful and ready to take me away…and stop my misery…" Kabuto said and pointed his neck with kunai. He breathed heavily and closed his eyes. His all body was trembling and making him crazy.**

"**Just a little bit…then it's over…" He whispered…and pushed the kunai right through his neck. Pure dark red blood leaked like a river through his wound, he threw up blood. Everything turned misty, he couldn't see anything properly… everything was foggy. He closed his eyes and fell to the lake. His body broke the water surface and started to sink to the bottom. His body felt so cold and heavy…then it turned hot and much lighter. He fell faster and faster through the darkness.**

"**Will I see the light…ever again?" Kabuto thought, everything looked so dark and hazy…until he saw a beautiful light and pair of cold soft hands pulled him up from the water. Sun was shining brightly, making Kabuto blind for a moment. He tried to see something. He realised he was in a shallow river, there were colourful charming meadows in the both sides of the river. Someone was holding him in his arms…a man figure…**

"**Kabuto…why…? It wasn't you time yet…" Familiar voice said. Kabuto finally saw the stranger…he wasn't a stranger…it was Orochimaru. He couldn't believe his eyes. He tried to fight against tears…but he broke down very soon and started to cry. He hugged Orochimaru and kissed him many times.**

"**I can't believe it…is this just some kind of a beautiful dream…or is this real?" Kabuto asked, holding Orochimaru tightly in his arms. Orochimaru stroked Kabuto's cheek and smiled.**

"**Yes…this is real…" Orochimaru said and tried to relax Kabuto, who was still shocked.**

"**I…couldn't live without you…it was like a part of me would be missing…I wouldn't love anyone as much as I love you. I felt so alone…so that's why I'm here…and it was worth it…" Kabuto said, still crying against Orochimaru's chest.**

"**I missed you too…everyday felt like hell in my heart…I couldn't kiss you, talk to you, touch you…or anything else…but now you are there again…and I won't let you go away…" Orochimaru nearly started to cry too.**

"**You promise to stay with me…? I don't want to lose you again and fell that emotion hell again…" Kabuto said sadly.**

"**As I said…I'll stay with you…forever…and after that too…" Orochimaru grinned and kissed Kabuto. Kabuto smiled back.**

"**So, is this heaven?" Kabuto asked as he looked around.**

"**Yeah…it's like real life…except, its better place. Come, I want to show you our house…and my big snake…" Orochimaru said smirking and picked up Kabuto on his arms.**

"**I see…that will be fun…and there's something I want to tell you…I'm pregnant…" Kabuto said and blushed. Orochimaru froze.**

"…**YOU ARE WHAT!?" Orochimaru yelled at Kabuto. Kabuto jumped to the ground and laughed.**

"**Just kidding! I was just screwing with your brains! Haha! " Kabuto laughed even harder and ran off to the meadow.**

"**Ouh…damn you! You son of bitch!! Come back here! I'm soooo going to bang your brains out!!" Orochimaru ran after Kabuto, while throwing away all of his clothes…even his underwear. **

"**No! I know you are going to rape my asshole! I won't give you that pleasure!...Jesus Christ!! Are you completely naked!? You pervert!" Kabuto screamed and fell over. Orochimaru jumped on top of Kabuto's body and smirked.**

"**Now…we shall make love until night comes…" He whispered in Kabuto's ear…and so they made love in the meadow. Nothing separated them…they stayed together forever…and after that. Their love bloomed like a beautiful flower and never shrivelled. It bloomed forever…through the hard times. Nothing can beat love's true power… **


End file.
